I really believe that –as sad as
that is – the only reason that this story has made it into the limelight is
that the girl is Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s niece. Regardless, it proves my point
about the entirety of “rape culture” and the common misconceptions about it. It
also shows just how empowered victims and support groups are about this.
Krista Ford tweeted today after
the string of downtown sexual assaults, “Stay alert, walk tall, carry mace,
take self-defence classes & don’t dress like a whore. #DontBeAVictim
#StreetSmart.” The tweet has since been taken down, but can be found to the article
linked at the bottom.
Ford seems to be, unfortunately,
one of the many people that are under the impression that the way someone
dresses deserves them of sexual assault and that not looking like a whore will ensure
that you’re not sexually assaulted. This seems to be one of the prevailing
themes associated with this rape culture, that if you dress like a whore you
should be treated like a whore or taken advantage of. I believe that whore is
such an archaic word in this day and age, which honestly shouldn’t exist, like
the word slut. Who is the reigning force on deciding what a whore or slut looks
like? I have a little bit of a v-neck going on today, does that make me a
whore? I’m wearing tight jeans, does that mean I’m a slut?
No. That’s ridiculous! This
whole culture that it’s appropriate to rape “whores” is absolutely gruesome.
People are people, who cares what they’re dressing like. Why do we choose to
actively persecute the victim instead of the aggressor? Ford made a choice to
tweet this, instead of warning people to be on the look-out, she told people to
#DontBeAVictim, carry mace and don’t look like a whore. It’s interesting that
only women dress to deserve being sexually assaulted, what if the string of
sexual assaults downtown were happening to men?
I hate the “don’t be a victim”
mentality. Loathe it. Yes, be empowered and stay alert to your surroundings,
but you don’t know what people are out there. You don’t know who is going to
think of you as their victim and clothes play only a minor role in that. People
are not assaulting the clothes, they’re assaulting the person.
Alice Moran, a victim of the
sexual assaults downtown posted the following letter, which I can’t even begin
to justice describing.
Dear a lot of people, but specifically Ms.
Krista Ford,
In advance I’d like to say I am sorry. This
is not the ideal situation to first acquaint oneself with someone and I am
mortified. Sorry! However, under the circumstance, I feel like you owe me a
moment of your time, even though we’ve never meet.
The circumstance being you called me a
whore.
I should clarify: I’m one of the victims of
the recent string of sexual assaults in the Annex. ‘Sup? It’s nice to make you
acquaintance.
So, you’ve called me a whore. Here we are.
This is awkward now, isn’t it? You’re probably wondering if I’m going to challenge
you on having been a member of Lingerie League. I’m not, because I’d never
slut-shame another woman. I believe you have a right to your body and
regardless of how you do or don’t dress it I believe you have a right to
respect and personal security. I guess that’s the key difference in our
thinking. You could wear a t-shirt that says “I’m literally asking for it” and
I’d still advocate for your security.
That’s what I’m asking for this brief
moment of your day, for your edification. You’re a woman and you should know
that your body is yours and yours alone. No matter how you dress it, you have a
right – an actual Charter of Rights and Freedom right – to not be sexually
assaulted. You are entitled to life, liberty and the security of person.
Welcome to Canada – you live here! If you weren’t aware of your Charter rights,
other Canadian things you may have missed out on are double-doubles, good maple
syrup, and Beachcombers*, so check that shit out.
For the record, I was sexually assaulted
while wearing a knee-length polka-dot dress. The last time I wore that dress,
it was to Easter dinner at my Gran’s, where I’m fairly certain I could make
little to no money whoring.
With due repect / sorry,
Alice Moran
Canadian / Comedian / Beachcombers Enthusiast
*I love Beachcombers.
Since starting to write this blog the Toronto Star has
posted that as per Twitter, Ford has apologized, stating: “I didn’t mean to cause such an alarm and I apologize if I did. I
just want women to be safe.”
I personally don’t buy the apology, as she didn’t
apologize for what she implied, just that people were “alarmed”, however she
only has 140 characters to work with. I really hope that she bucks and takes
this as a learning opportunity and publicly addresses the comments that she
made and the letter that Alice posted to Facebook.
It’s ridiculous that in this day
and age where we’ve got all this good there are still people that believe that
based on what you wear you deserve your sexual assault.
All of the props to Alice Moran,
who in my mind is a brilliantly brave woman for standing up against this way of
thinking in a way that is nothing but mature and well-thought.
Information
taken from the following articles:
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